without love we perish

Tuesday, January 30

when was the last time you did something for the first time?

i had a couple of firsts last year. exhilerating and downright gross too.

climbed natural rock for the first time. i really have to say it transformed my life, from a swaku gym-rat to someone who keeps dreaming of touching real rock again. The sensation of the cold rock on your fingers is tingling, yet so touching. A bit like dipping your finger into the hot water in the bathtub just before you plunge yourself into the reservoir of warmth.

kissed a guy for the first time. well, almost. unwillingly of course. some kind of sick forfeit that i was dragged into. it happened with a tissue between. and this will never ever happen again.

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sundays are for napping and this has been the case for many weekends before. wake up at 9+, read the papers, watch some tv, nap, lunch, nap, homework, nap...and so on. it is very boring and tiring when you have nothing interesting to do. especially now that saturdays are reserved for climbing, what remains of the weekend is left to settle the burdens of school.

it is not unexpected that now that i'm in the climbing team, my life revolves around the climbing team and the rock gym. there are some dull moments, particularly injury periods and times when you just can't seem to stick on the walls and everything thrown at you crushes you. these kill morale real quick and you need to be strong to get past them. good team-mates help you overcome your weaknesses, bad ones laugh at you. it is my fortune to have a team that is supportive and fun, always shouting "Go Jensen! Aller Jensen!" when i scream, grunt,shout and 'kek' my way through tough routes even though whether i finish it or not is not really their business at all. and of course i return the favour, not just superficially, but genuinely hoping that they send the problem and jump off the wall with satisfaction, achievement and a big smile on their face. thank the big guy ( or girl) in the sky for this team.

School has also taken its toll on me. I live to regret my decision of choosing engineering, although sometimes i think i'm better off dead. 2 and a half more years and i will be free from the chains which bound me. but maybe i'll be too timid to venture beyond this prison. until then, i'll be plotting my Prison Break.

there is no love life to speak of. sounds so sore, but it's true. haha. people have come and gone, i wish all with bliss. and maybe my maiden will appear soon, to this passive guy who knows not a thing about romance (or do i?). yes, my plan for the prettiest team in the whole of NUS is still undergoing, next sem, the chief judge of the girl's team selection will not spare anyone. sweet.

i think girls with small eyes are cute. and thin girls are not. eat more and get some nice curves, spare your boyfriend the agony of fearing breaking your bones somehow.

2nd May. I see you soon.

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