Stir-fried lizard brain

1 whole live lizard with brains, left and right
3 tbs butter
5 textbooks
5 files of notes
Some salt and pepper to taste
Extremely erratic weather


melt butter in saucepan until simmering
add textbooks and files. Fry for 2 minutes.
Wait for extremely erratic weather.
slice open lizard head and extract brains.
add right brain and stir fry for 2 minutes.
add salt and pepper to your liking.
slice left brain thin and serve on top of dish.
serve with lizard's blood.


do not harm any small animals in the process of cooking.