i need to let this out.
i am officially burnt out.
my fingers are throbbing as i type, my mental state is in chaos, i haven't done tutorials for 2 modules since day 1, skipping lectures like nothing, rock camp stuff still yet to be confirmed.
and now, i am part-time maid owing to my mum's recent operation. i will not complain about the maid part. it's something i should do and i will willingly do it. just that it further squeezes in a few elephants into my already bursting brain.
in terms of climbing, i haven't seen much progress yet. fingers are complaining, competitive spirit is waning. but i still love it. maybe after all responsibility of the camp is shed, i will rediscover the carefree attitude that i had as a junior. but that's rather impossible, given that someone has to help guide the juniors. i'm not playing a major trainer role, but i'd still like to see them climb well.
my 4 projects are killing me. not that i've really started on any of them. but the thought that they will be occupying my life for the whole of this and next month is frightening. i haven't been so scared since the Krabi trip. it's really gonna ruin my life. engineers have no life, so how can i die? i don't know, i think i will die many times over and over again. day in day out, it's all about thinking of the assignment deadlines, project meetings and deadlines, camp stuff, the stupid bbq, this shit that shit.
oh man, please come soon, december. if not, i may actually need a god to help me tide through all these crap.